Tales of the dancing divorcee...enroute to rediscovering thyself

I was never someone who was very comfortable with her body. Too skinny, too thin, all skin and bones and wierd angles. The kind of clothes I loved wearing - never seemed to suit me and hence it all just used to turn into one big mish mash. Post marriage well, you dont really care too much. If I'm honest about it - V used to take better care of himself than I did. He used to ensure everything was tip top everytime we stepped out. For me most of the time - I couldn't be bothered and when I did - well, I was never too happy with the end result.

Now, I truly feel liberated. I have started exploring styles and thoroughly enjoying the process of getting all gussied up for a day or night out about town! From Palazzo's to Capris to SKIRTS and DRESSES! I'm actually enjoying the process of rediscovering myself.  I never used to experiment with hair styles, mostly because I'd never know what to do with my stupendously curly hair, but now thanks to Youtube and a certain someone at Toni & Guy I have started doing a lot more with my hair and it feels kickass!I am feeling comfortable in my own skin for the first time so atleast thats one good thing thats come out of the divorce. I even bit the bullet and got myself a tattoo! Me of all people! Anyone who knows me well enough can attest to the fact that I am terrified of needles. I cant stand them and to date they are my biggest fear. Which is ironic, given that as a hypo thyroid patient, one does get subjected an n number of blood tests. So yes, I will admit to the fact that I was terrified beyond belief of the deed and which is also one of the reasons why I chose to go and do it all  alone. I figured, even if I do make a fool of myself  - nobody is going to be any wiser! In any case, I turned 30 and managed to get inked!

Turning 30. Isnt that supposed be a milestone of sorts? When i was in my teens and 30 seemed like such a far off thing - I never quite pictured things would turn out like this. Then again, one never really pictures stuff like this either! In the scheme of things, I know that this is a blip and, I was probably mourning the end of an "idea" of what I pictured a marriage to be rather than the actual relationship itself(a very wise person told me that!) and, I have probably learnt more about myself in the last couple of months than the last couple of years put together. I have learnt that -

- I am more stronger than I ever gave myself credit for
- I am truly comfortable going out alone. Sometimes I just need some space. I think we all do.
- People will not change. They all have their own POV's and their own perspectives and while they will try and "counsel" you with the best of intentions, dont let it get to you. Rise above.
- So long as you believe in yourself, nothing else matters
- As selfish as it may sound, you are the only one who will look out for you. Listen to that inner voice. It's there for a reason
- Yes, people will look and comment and pass snide remarks. So be it. People will always talk. It doesnt matter. It really doesnt.
- No matter what, my family has my back

The thing is, I don't know what lies ahead and thats the bare naked truth. It's a scary thought, but its also a very exciting one as well. My journey to rediscovering myself has only just begun and I honestly cant wait to find out what's in store for me!

This is me signing off - until next time!